And the award for most innovative pickle goes to...

Tonight marks the 62nd Primetime Emmy Awards. Living in Los Angeles, that translates to street closures, high traffic at highly unusual times of the day, and parties. Oh, the parties. But beside the unwelcome interruption to my routine, award shows mean exactly nothing to me. I'd rather spend 4 hours watching reruns of Little House on the Prairie. Or maybe slowly filing my toenails.

If I had to sit in the audience of an award show, however, here are some shows I could possibly tolerate more than I can our film and TV accolades. And I sense the egos of award winners might be less as well.

Name of Award: The Briney
Category: Pickles

Name of Award: The Money Shaker
Category: Creativity in Panhandling

Name of Award:The Orange Jumpsuit
Category: Best in Celebrity Arrests

Name of Award: The Twit
Category: Inane Use of Twitter

Name of Award: The Get Me a Coffee
Category: Assistants to Award Winners

Tonight: Full Bleed Photography Exhibition

Thanks to my pal Jesse for reminding me about this great one. I can't go, but please everyone--go for me. Take snaps of all the hipsters in a 15 mile of Downtown for me as they'll surely all be swarming this warehouse tonight. But, in earnest, the show should be cool.

FULL BLEED
Celebrating 30 Years of skateboarding photography from the new VICE Books release

Saturday, August 28, 2010
PHOTOGRAPHY EXHIBITION
6 - 10 p

6th Street Warehouse
E. 6th St.
Los Angeles, CA

Free wifi with a side of coffee & a Jesus sighting.

In my new life as a freelancer, aka a coffee shop-hopping/free wifi-seeking traveling ninja, it's been a fun game of sorts to find new places to camp out at that are not my studio apartment in Koreatown.

As I come across LA's freelancer-friendly gems, I'll share 'em with you.

You're welcome.

Whole Foods - Fairfax & 3rd

I know what you're thinking. Who wants to work from a supermarket. Well, I do. And you might too. Whole Foods has got comfortable and plentiful seating. Inside and out. A cafe. A salad bar for lunch. And people watching for eons.

Tips

* Feeling frugal? Just pick up a large Whole Foods brand water for under a dollar.
* On Wednesdays, the generally overpriced salad bar is discounted.
* Sit in the 'West Wing' if possible because a) calling it the West Wing will make you feel pretentious and overinflated, and b) sometimes the 'East Wing' attracts the 'crazy people.' And by 'crazy people' I mean homeless people who bicker over table territory and actors reading lines.

Warnings

* Power outlets are not aplenty. In fact, there may not be any at all.

Etcetera

* Jesus hangs out here. You know Jesus. He's the long-haired, bearded dude who walks Sunset Boulevard at night wearing a long white smock and occasionally dons a cane. Well, apparently he eats organic. He's also got a MacBook Pro. And possibly a younger girlfriend. Who woulda thought.

* Sometimes you'll think there are hookers shopping here. They are not hookers. They're just near middle aged women trying to hold onto their youth with neon short skirts and clear plastic heels.

* The pastry guy asked me out. Maybe this doesn't mean anything to you. But I've got an ego to uphold. And not much to feed it. So give me a moment to gloat about the pastry guy, will you? Okay...I feel better now.

Red Bull Flugtag: Make it. Fly it. Crash it.

In my world of freelance events, the work is generally interesting. I can't complain. Or I shouldn't anyway. But sometimes an event stands out as so rad, so unusual, so totally bizarre that I feel compelled to share it with you.

So, friends, some pictures from last Saturday's Red Bull Flugtag event, held in Downtown Long Beach, are below. For those of you who don't know the event: 30+ teams are selected to build homemade crafts, get them to the Long Beach pier, and catapult them off a 30' launching pad. Most crafts, needless to say, nosedive straight into the water. With their team. To the 100,000 person audience's great joy and entertainment.

A sneak peak at some crafts the night before.

The craft ideas ranged from political to artistic to ridiculous.

The entraceway in. The quiet before the storm.

The pre-show included a stunt from Red Bull's killer skydivers. Skater Ryan Sheckler also skated off the ramp into the water below. I injured myself just watching all this from afar.

Our amazingly fun judges hard at work.

A view from the Judges' Tower of just some of the 100,000 guests.

The Judges: Tenley (The Bachelor), Ryan Sheckler (Red Bull athlete), Nicole Sullivan (MAD TV, Sh+t My Dad Says), Cheech Marin (Cheech & Chong), Dave Sanchez (KROQ)

Before the sunburn set in, my pal & I--talent coordinators extraordinaire (or so they say).

Spoon makes screaming sound so, so good.

Britt Daniel. You can scream at me any time you want. Cause though it sounds like you might be causing irrevocable damage to your vocal chords singing this song, I just don't want it to stop. Brilliant.

Amusement parks: where style & class go to die.

Because no birthday should ever last less than a solid week, last Wednesday meant a birthday celebration Part Deux with some of my nearest and dearest girlfriends...at Cali's largest and most famed amusement park. Not having been to the theme park since I was a child, I was excited for the mid-week adventure to Anaheim. What I found, beside roller coasters and a hint of nausea, is documented below. Beware, residents of major metropolitan areas, theme parks should be considered foreign, if not alien, lands. The residents there--a different breed. The style--questionable if not non-existent.

Get the flash player here: http://www.adobe.com/flashplayer

Cee-Lo avoids censorship on the interwebs.

If Janet can't show boob on national television, there's no way this single was going to make it to the airwaves. So, Cee-Lo said 'Fuck You' to censorship and put his catchy new single, profanities and all, online. With more than 1 million views on YouTube, it seems that the general public is not so easily offended after all. And, after all, the song's about lost love. And who among us who's had our hearts broken hasn't wanted to shout 'Fuck You' too.

You're invited: A very special birthday celebration.

Dear friends, readers & strangers who've taken a liking to me,

You only turn 25 4 times. So, please consider taking time out of your usual Sunday night routines (trips to Target, lounging on the couch in your underwear, and drinking beer at unruly sports bars) to celebrate my birthday with me. Details below...

Sunday, August 15th
7 p - 12 a

R Bar
3331 West 8th Street (b/w Ardmore & Irolo)
Los Angeles, CA 90005

Reasons why you'll want to be in attendance:

* The bar's amazing kitchen will be open for service. So come hungry. Hungry & thirsty.
* There is a jukebox. It's not bad.
* If you don't like the crowd, I'm sure you can find a tacqueria in the neighborhood that's more your speed.
* I promise not to be in my birthday suit. I'm fully aware that after the first 25th, no one wants to see that.
* The party starts early. Get in. Get out. Get to bed by midnight.
* Though Robert Pattinson will not be coming (so his publicist says), I may or may not supply a life-size cut-out of him in the corner for photo opps.

Feel free to invite your friends who enjoy birthdays, celebrations, and me. The more, the merrier they tell me.

RSVP: to jessie.b.rubin@gmail.com by Friday, August 14th so I can let the bar know how many of your beautiful faces to expect.

Hope to see you there!

xo * Jessie

A day and night in Koreatown: Jonathan Gold, BBQ & Soju.

Just in time for the Jersey Shore of Koreatown (yeah, I'm not good enough to just make this stuff up--the SituASIAN has officially been born), my friend and I took to the streets of my neighborhood this past Saturday looking to see what actually happens in K-Town on a weekend. And from day to night...for better and for worse...we found out.

A stop at McDonald's for a soda and a 'snack wrap' for my buddy, led to the realization that not all Mickey D's are created equally. In Koreatown, for instance, the franchise decorates with what can only be described as a hybrid between tiki tacky and religious offering.

At the Koreatown BBQ Cookoff, where esteemed judges Jonathan Gold, Chef Ludo (famous now for his Ludobites), and Sandra Oh (who is qualified to judge a Korean cookoff only for being Korean so far as I can tell) were on hand, I let my friend handle the meat sampling while I checked out the crucial vegatarian fare (soju, desserts and more soju)...

In a quest not to leave a 1.5 mile radius of my apartment, the evening took us to R Bar (home of my upcoming birthday party) and HMS Bounty (home of the previous year's birthday party).

Lessons learned in Koreatown:

1. Dessert is the only Korean food I care to partake in. I knew this...but I enjoyed confirming it with ice cream and Choco Pie.

2. Korean men will hit on me. This is both confusing and ego-boosting. I will not question it...for now.

3. I like to stay close to home on my birthday.

Tie-Dye Nails. Cause sure, this is a good use of our time.

Nail trends are coming and going faster than girls take their dresses off at prom these days. From gels to airbrush to Lindsay Lohan's micro-profanities, nails are the latest canvas for personal expression.

So, on Friday night, after a few cocktails and a diminished common sense, my good friend and comrade, Renee, convinced me to scotch tape all my digits and dip them into polish-splattered water, creating what's apparently the newest DIY nail fad--tie-dye nails.

I'll tell you this much about our results. Each nail is certainly 'different.' And by different, I mean 'special.' And by 'special,' I mean a little 'funny.' But they photograph well.

And here they are...

Vows. I'll start with someone else's.

I've been meaning to jot down a list of resolutions of sorts. Things that have been floating around in my well-intended head. Like improving my well-being. And telling people how I feel when I feel it. And making more time for the important things. Thus far, I have not been able to make the time to make this list. So, I've got some things to work out.

But as luck would have it, I came across this blog post by David Karp--young, skinny lad and also the founder of Tumblr. And while I don't encourage stealing other people's vows, sometimes when you don't have time to create your own, it helps to start with someone else's.

Life Improvements

Things I’ve changed this year:

1. I added a bunch of mail filters.
2. I don’t use a computer at home. I keep an eye on my Inbox (and occasionally browse the web) with my iPad.
3. We don’t turn our TV on unless we’re watching something with undivided attention.
4. We replaced all of our big squishy furniture with smaller, more designed, mid-century inspired pieces. After returning from Japan, all of our old furniture looked and felt ridiculous.
5. I carry less. I replaced my wallet with a money/card clip that’s small enough for my front pocket. I reduced my keychain to two keys (home and office) zip tied together. I don’t carry headphones anymore, because…
6. I listen to much less music. Music (and film) can have a noticeable emotional effect on me. I decided my music was encouraging emotions I didn’t care for, namely anticipation, aggression, and self-admiration.
7. I’ve been trying to cook more. Even though cooking is impossible.
8. I’ve been eating much better. I had already given up coffee and soda a couple years ago, but Rachel’s made some improvements. :)
9. I’ve been going to bed before midnight. And usually waking up before 10AM on weekends.
10. I unsubscribed from Google Alerts. Way too much noise to be useful.
11. I’ve been much more disciplined in avoiding and ignoring pointlessly negative voices. I’m lucky that it doesn’t happen often, but when I catch someone being particularly nasty to me, I use it as a cue to do something nice for someone I love.
12. I’ve thrown out almost everything. My media cabinet is finally in order, with a modem, AirPort, Mac Mini, Xbox, and a few remotes. My closet now contains about 20 AA t-shirts, socks, boxer briefs, 12 collared shirts, 4 Marc by Marc Jacobs jeans, 3 suits, a tie rack, some bags, and some shoes. I have 9 books on my shelf, 3 cameras, and a small box of miscellanea. I live with a chef, so I have no idea what the fuck is in my kitchen — except for my Ove Glove. Having stuff blows. Liquidity is the new luxury!

[Excerpt pasted in its entirety from the blog of David Karp.]

Savor Los Angeles. You were too good to me.

Last night marked the first of yet another tasting event in Los Angeles. But this one, I'm pleased to announce was all about the good stuff--sugary, coma-inducing, good stuff. That's right my friend--an entire tasting event dedicated to dessert. Because why bother with dinner, when you can skip straight to frosted, oozing, sweet desserts.

I had about 15 minutes to get in and out of Savor Los Angeles and thanks to my early arrival before the masses of hungry people had arrived, I was able to hit up every single table. From Babycakes, the new downtown bakery that serves up gluten free and vegan treats, to Plasir whose cheesecake cream puff I did not realize was a cream puff and exploded all over my hand, to the cute, tatted baristas of Intelligentsia (yes, I'm referring to them and not their coffee)--all the samples were too generous and left with me with a sugar high that [I can only imagine] rivals the quick high and fall of a crack pipe. (Correct--I just compared cream puffs and brownie bites to crack cocaine.)

Though I was armed only with a sad, flash-less camera phone, below are the memories of my 15 minutes in heaven.

Confessions of an LA driver.

Los Angeles is the greatest city that's not a city in this country. And as a non-city it's got the crappiest public transportation system known to traveling man. So I drive. And I drive. And I drive.

And these are the things I do in the car. They're wrong. They're unsafe. Some are unethical. But I do them. You'd be lying if you said you didn't do at least one of them too.

• I text. I don't just text quick answers back to friends. I text notes to myself. I set calendar appointments. I write down ideas for my future memoir.
• I put on makeup. In the end, everyone's a little better off if I've got concealer on so this one's almost acceptable. But listen--sometimes I've got to put on a full face. And a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do.
• I close the windows when I'm listening to bad music...that I like. 
• I open the windows when cute boys roll by...and quickly change the station from Top 40 to KCRW. 
• I run yellows.
• I curse.
• I sometimes change lanes without signaling.
• I daydream about someday driving a station wagon with kids in the back.
• I occasionally drive with my knee.
• I talk to myself while pretending to talk into my phone.
• I stop--every once in a while--at a fast food drive through.
• I park between 2 larger vehicles. And nap.
• I pray not to hit small children.
• I marvel at the sunny skies and palm tree-lined roads.

Come As You Are @ PRISM [art in LA]

The PRISM Gallery's young owners were barely out of preschool when Nirvana frontman, Kurt Cobain, passed. But beside this exhibit's questionable reference to the 90s band's greatest hit, this evening's group show at Sunset's newest, freshest gallery is going to be a-mazing.

From the colorful work of the Clayton Brothers to the trippy, pattern heavy contributions of Ryan McGinness, alongside pieces by Prism staple, Barry McGee, the recently dearly departed, Dennis Hopper, and others, this show is one you shouldn't miss.

Prism Gallery
8746 W. Sunset Boulevard
West Hollywood, CA 90069

LA Street Food Fest. I went. I ate. I ate some more.

On Saturday night, we packed a blanket and an appetite and headed east to Pasadena where the LA Street Food Fest was giving things a second go (the organizers' first attempt at the fest sounded awesome but a bit more unruly) at the ginormous Rose Bowl. The lines were still long (like, really long), but there was plenty to distract us as we waited in line after line for samples from the city's most popular food trucks (who were, incidentally, stationed at tented booths and not trucks--I was as confused as you are), including dancers, indie sounds from The Deadly Syndrome, a speech read off a crumpled paper by Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa, and plenty of colorful characters stuffing their faces with 20 different kinds of ice cream and Singha Beer.

Note to my vegetarian brethren: I definitely didn't eat my $45 ticket's worth. Restos were giving out only 1 or 2 samples each, and most of these weren't veg-friendly. I'd complain, except events like these clearly aren't meant for diets like mine. And I knew that. Many thanks to Starry Kitchen though for the amazingness of their tofu balls (see banana below for reference) which won the hearts of vegetarians and carnivores alike.

In celebration of Lions.

From July 23rd to August 22nd, the Sun is in Leo. Ask me for a detailed explanation of this statement and I'll have approximately nothing intelligible to say. I'm not a quack after all with nothing better to do than study my sign (you haven't seen the daily astrological newsletters in my inbox, have you?!)--just a moderate believer. I don't know the ins and outs of the stars and the sun and the currently full moon. I just know that Leos are fierce and fabulous.

And as a Leo myself, I say this to my fellow fiery, affectionate, creative, bossy and incredible sisters and brothers of the zodiac: Happy Birthday. Let's party. (Let's just not say how old we're turning, m'kay?)

Currently Listening to: Janelle Monae's Tightrope

Thanks to my buddy Shane for sharing this video featuring 3 of hip hop's newest stars. Cause everyone knows everything's fresher in black and white.

P.S. B.o.B. You have a little piece of my heart.

Sexy coffee & frog legs at Robert's Russian Cuisine.

Robert's Russian Cuisine, located in a small strip mall on La Brea in Hollywood, isn't the type of place you'd necessarily drive by and say 'hm, I'd like to eat there.' It's more the kind of place you drive by and think 'hm, I believe many blond Russian girls are probably fed much vodka there before returning to either the nightclub or the spy movie from whence they came.' It turns out, as I did go in last night, that the latter is not entirely untrue. The brightly lit restaurant was full at midnight with tables of Russian men and their very blond women, consuming shot for shot from bottles of the good stuff. Stuff, I should mention, that was not on the menu alongside the $4 glasses of wine. I guess it's BYOV. But it turns out that they do serve food there too. And the menu's quite extensive.

The food: From Tongue to Frog Legs to Beef Stroganoff, the menu reads like a laundry list of everything I've never tried in my life. With the exception of hummus. And who knew the Russians and the Israelis shared such incredibly good taste.

The service: I can't say enough wonderful things about our gray-haired Russian waiter who wore many large rhinestoned rings, had only half a thumb on one hand, and spoke nearly no English at all. But did know enough to explain that the Armenian coffee we ordered after dinner was 'sexy coffee.' 'Why sexy,' we asked. 'Because it keeps you up all night. All you can do is have sex.' Well, naturally. I will say this for the shots of coffee we consumed--they were goopy, and almost impossible to swallow, and in every way spectacular.

The verdict: Don't go to Robert's for the food or the atmosphere. Do consider, however, going to chat with the waiters. They are highly entertaining even if their capacity for conversation does not exceed sex or coffee.

David LaChapelle's American Jesus, or the Redemption of Michael Jackson

Photographer David LaChapelle has been showcasing the famous, infamous and often outrageous side of pop culture (and counterculture) for nearly two decades. After shooting some of the most recognizable faces of our generation (think Britney Spears, Tupac Shakur, Amanda Lepore, and Hillary Clinton) for Interview Magazine and other notable publications, he took a slight departure to work on music video direction, stage work, and other creative ventures.

Well, LaChapelle is bringing his work back into the gallery. His current solo exhibition, ‘American Jesus,’ opened last week at New York’s Paul Kasmin Gallery and features LaChapelle’s old friend Michael Jackson, shot just before his passing in a biblically inspired series of images that are colorful and poppy, yet offer a deep and thoughtful narrative. The show reads like a public defense of Jackson who’s portrayed as an angelic martyr, as well as a not-so-subtle jab at the Catholic Church. Making an appearance in the exhibit as well is Naomi Campbell, depicted as Botticelli’s Venus.

I know it's not likely possible, but in the future, I want the world to appear like a giant LaChapelle photograph--colorful and whimsical and just.

[This post appeared in its original form on Curated.]

Go See: In The Heights at the Pantages

Do you remember the first time you saw someone you knew from high school in the newspaper? Or an old college buddy's face on the news? There's that mixed emotion of pride, happiness and then slight queasiness as you remember that you are still living in a studio apartment earning just above livable wages at a job that will review you annually and serves stale pastries in the cafeteria. And didn't you and the wall street tycoon on the cover of WSJ graduate the same year?!

Well, a few years ago, when I was back in New York, I looked up in the subway to see an old college acquaintance's face lining the interior of the MTA's A train. Lin Manuel Miranda hadn't yet won a Tony for what had started as a project back at our Alma Mater, Wesleyan University, but In The Heights had just made it to Broadway. And I felt all the pride and the happiness but somehow none of the impending nausea. This had been a great show at school. My friends had raved. They had sung the songs after. And there was no nicer person to be at the helm.

Now, a few years later still, In The Heights is on tour and in Los Angeles. I went to see the show last night, and though Musical doesn't generally fall under my top 5 genres of entertainment, the show is incredible. From the hip-shaking Latina salon owners who offer comic relief to the serious issues of immigration and dreams fulfilled and personal struggle, this show kicks other musicals' asses.

It's at the Pantages til July 25th. Go, go, go.

Tickets are available on the show's site. Or cheaper through Goldstar for select dates.

Tip: Nearby restaurant Delphine at the W Hollywood was quick. And delicious. And hosts an array of good looking servers. Eat there first.