Signs of the Time.

Seen around town this weekend...

Most of you have never actually sat on a bus bench before (never having rode LA's public transportation system, ya gas guzzling earth-killers). But perhaps you've caught some of LA's most impactful marketing messages on their backs.

This ad, touting Pastor Shepherd's Prayer Hour, caught my eye. Maybe it was the bug-eyed stare of a cult leader. Or maybe it was the combination of multiple offensive pastel colors. But I was moved to drive around the block a second time to snap this picture.

Upon investigation of the supposed Pastor's website, I found this inspired promo video from the Pastor himself.

I assume Pastor Shepherd is a comedian and not a holy man. Though some might not find there to be a difference between the two anyway.

Later in the weekend I came across this sign seeking a missing girl, Elizabeth Vega. Now, I am not a heartless bitch. I think it's absolutely terrible that this family's daughter has gone MIA. I do, however, wonder if they might have found a more dignified picture of their FIFTEEN year old to post all over East Hollywood--one without, let's say, the bared midriff and 'take me now' pose.

Earth Day. Let’s fix this sh*thole up.

Happy Earth Day everyone! In honor of our planet--and it being the only on we can live on and all--here are my 10 tips for cleaning up the sh*thole we’ve let the place become.

1. Recycle your paper. Those flirty emails from your boyfriend that you printed when you first starting dating? He dumped you already. Chuck the evidence. And recycle all your old porn while you’re at it too.

2. Turn off the lights when you leave your house. I know your mother taught you this was a good idea so burglars would think you were home. But you and I both know that no one wants to steal your crap.

3. Use less toilet paper. I know with certainty that many of you are TP offenders. None of your parts are that delicate. You do not need half the roll to wipe.

4. Take the stairs. Your office is 5 flights up? Well, let’s be honest—your gluts could use the workout and that elevator could use the rest.

5. Hug a tree. No, don’t really please. Plant one with Forest Aid. Or pay someone else to plant one for you.

6. Stop buying leather bondage gear. And other leather goods. I know—they’re soft and supple. But they’re not eco (or animal) friendly.

7. Reduce your water consumption. I’m not suggesting you stop showering. No, no—none of us would want that. Just don’t shower for soooo long. It will help the water drought AND will save neighbors extra minutes of hearing you sing Les Mis in the bathroom.

8. Use a re-usable tote at the store. You’ve probably been given a hundred free ones by now. Stop using them for dirty laundry and start taking them to the bloody grocery store.

9. Don’t have 20 kids. I know babies make you happy. They make me happy too. But you don’t need that 20^th one. Seriously. I’m talking to you, Octo-Mom.

10. Utilize public transportation. Public can be frightening, especially here in LA. But no one told you to start dating that chick who lived all the way across town. And the mileage is putting a serious damper on the ozone.

* Feel free to ‘recycle’ these tips for green living with your not-so-green friends. Even your pals who hate granola and think organic is for dirty hippies can start to clean up their act.

xo * Jessie B. R.

We Like to Party: We went Doooowntoooown.

Cult classic Little Shop of Horrors got it right when they described downtown...

Downtown...Where the folks are broke.
Downtown...Where your life's a joke.
Downtown...When you buy your token,
you go...Home to skid row.

And here in Los Angeles, downtown still fits this description better than the downtown area of any other city I've visited.

Efforts to revitalize the area, made by neighborhood councils, development companies, and local businesses include frequent events meant to make downtown's new and desirable residents feel like there is indeed a community there--that they are not alone in their expensive lofts. That despite the remaining missions and shopping cart communities, the lack of schools or health facilities, the absence of all but one supermarket, they live in a vibrant, artistic, thriving neighborhood. On weekends like this past one, you almost believe they hype.

In honor of 'Repeal Day'--this year the 75th marker since the end of prohibition--Dewar's celebrated all around Downtown, a neighborhood where the brand has really made its mark. We attended the private party held by Dewar's at Seven Grand, Downtown nightlife empasario, Sed Moses' whisky bar. Complimentary hats, boas, whisky (courtesy of Dewar's), food (courtesy of Casey's Irish Pub), music (courtesy of DJ Daisy O and Foreign Born and others), and comedy was served.

Fun fact: Whisky can apparently be spelled 2 ways. I always assumed it was spelled with an 'e,' as in whiskey. On Friday, I noticed that all of Dewar's collateral spells it without the 'e,' as in whisky. In an effort to be open-minded, I've begun spelling it the latter way.

Not so fun fact: Apparently Irish food consists of very little vegetarian fare, as I discovered on Friday night when even the vegetables were wrapped in meat. Hence, my leaving early, before the fun was finished.

Last night, we travelled downtown again for the Old Bank District's holiday block party. Hosted by Gilmore Associates, the development company that essentially owns the entire district and Little Radio, the downtown music and party staple, the evening was a coming together of the restaurants, arts community and musical curators of the area. A light installation, pictured left added a festive feel to the streets.

Take a look closer and notice the parking restrictions that make having a car in Downtown such a pleasure. I guess this would be the optimum moment to plug the DASH. But seeing as I've never rode public transportation in LA, that would make me feel like a big, fat liar.

We popped into Bar 107, where I discovered for the first time, the incredibly kitschy and fun back room, complete with a van door-framed bar.

We stopped into one of the local gallery spaces where a cigarette-girl type accompanied one of the pieces. She was selling $10 chocolate bars, promising that one of the bars contained a 'golden ticket' that would win me the entire installation. The installation was comprised of a grafitied wall, cardboard boxes and, well, her. Ah, downtown arts.

Leaving the well-lit streets of the Old Bank District we headed further East into the less-developed Industrial District where architecture students and hobos still reign supreme. On a little block of 3rd Street, a few businesses have popped up, adding a glimmer of commercialism and tasty eats to an otherwise bleak area.

Upon leaving our darling friend Jackie's birthday party at Blue Dahlia Cafe, we encountered a homeless man pissing on the corner of a parked Prius. This is the downtown LA's known for years. This is the downtown LA that is being hidden behind street fests and sushi restaurants. Hey, if I were a bum that had been bussed here only to have a luxury loft condo built on my block a decade later...I might piss on your hybrid too.

Photo credits: Doo-wop girls - Little Shop of Horrors, Photos 2, 3, 4, 5 - Jessie B. R.