Text o'the Day: Hey Papi Wus Up

Earlier today, in a case of mistaken phone identity, I had the pleasure of participating in the following conversation over text...

Texter: Hey PAPI WUS UP WIT U

Me: Who is this?

Texter: Dis is DASHKA U GAVE ME UR NUMBA OFF MYSPACE U LEFT IT ON MA COMMENT DO YOU REMBER OR U STILL NOT SURE?

Me: Wrong number.

Well, not 'rember'ing Dasha or our apparent MySpace love affair, I entered in Dashka's name in the MySpace search box, intrigued by who might show up.

What showed up was this:

Allow me to zoom in closer so that you might get a better glimpse of Daksha's literary interests.

I am so, so scared.