Tipping: a rant by yours truly.

Let me begin this by saying that a) I have worked in the service industry for years--planning events, catering, waitressing (I may have gotten fired from the latter, but this does not disqualify the mention), and b) I know that many employees are paid less than minimum wage with the assumption that they will be tipped, and c) I rarely rant on here, so give me a break while I proceed to do just that.

The tipping system is broke and it needs fixing. The system creates a situation in which I, the consumer, am made to feel personally responsible for certain service providers' salaries. And the last thing a Jewish girl's guilty conscience needs is someone's livelihood on her hands. As much as I may like my waitress, I don't need to end my meal with thoughts of her unpaid rent if I don't dole out an additional 20% to her for bringing out food I've already paid for. The clerk at Nordstrom's shoe department brings lots of things back and forth to me but I'm not expected to throw cash at him.

There are tons of places to read up on tipping etiquette, but none can tell me why some professions are tip-based and others salaried.

One of these sites does offer up the following scenario, however...

Have you had a hard day traveling or at work? Do you feel a little grumpy? Were you sharp with someone?

Well, guess what! People in service industries don't always have great days either. Show them a little mercy and assume the best about them. Maybe your waiter is a little absent-minded because his mother is sick in the hospital.

Righto. I do feel grumpy. Because I just gave $5 of my measly salaried cash to some dude who can't land an acting gig and therefore has to refill my diet coke. He's grumpy?! Well, he should get a steady job.

And if we are going to continue the archaic practice of tipping, I vote that we make the following jobs and activities tippable...

1. Being a good friend. That's right. If you call me to blather on about some problem of yours, I want a dollar.

2. Temp work. Think your temporary secretary answered the phone with enthusiasm and speed? Tip 'er a couple bucks.

3. Supermarket bagger. I have had some fantastic baggers. They put the heavy stuff on the bottom, the produce up top. They deserve their fair share.

4. Graffiti artist. Do you have an illeagal mural in your neighborhood that speaks to you? Take a photo of the artist's tag. Show it around to some 'in the know' folks in the area. Find that guy who defaced local property. And slip him a 5!

5. Marketing & Events. Who makes you go out and buy things you don't need? Who convinces you of brand loyalties you didn't know you had? That's right--your local marketing and events worker. She deserves a cut of the company's action. And who better to give it to 'er than you. Tip her a hundy for all her hard work....oh, I'm a Marketing & Events worker? Well, gosh then. Thanks so much in advance for recognizing my hard work and paying me for it.

826LA's Echo Park Lake Paddle Boat Regatta. Cause reading's for winners.

If you're reading this, I'm pretty sure you can read. If you can't, then let me include some pictures here for your entertainment:


Now, back to those of you who are literate. Being a reader and all, you understand the significance of reading, learning and edumacation. 826LA is a non-profit that ensures that the young people of LA receive the tutoring, reading skills, and creative voice they deserve. This Sunday, the org is hosting its 2nd Annual Paddle Boat Regatta. Yes, it is as fancy and regal as it sounds. And it's not too late to register a team to participate.

If you can't participate, raise money, and compete for greatness, consider joining me as a spectator.

The event needs all the $$$ help it can get so please consider getting involved.

Peep the details below!

xx * Jessie

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Please join us on July 26th at 4PM at Echo Park Lake for the pageantry on the lake as we celebrate the teams* of volunteers, staff and interns who have been racing for four weeks to raise money for 826LA!

We are also offering a limited number of tickets to The VIP After Party at the Rec Center to spectators (NON-RACERS**) for a donation of $15 (to cover food and drink costs). Don't let the fun end at the lake! Come to the after party and mix and mingle with your favorite teams! RVSP

Prizes will be awarded for the following categories:

Winners of Fundracing (highest fundraising team)

Best Costumes

Best Theme

Team Spirit

Best Paddle Boat Manuever - a quick figure 8 or something better!

Spectators Choice - the crowd will choose!

MVP - most valuable pedaler (highest individual fundraiser)

Click here to register or learn more.

Text o'the Day: Hey Papi Wus Up

Earlier today, in a case of mistaken phone identity, I had the pleasure of participating in the following conversation over text...

Texter: Hey PAPI WUS UP WIT U

Me: Who is this?

Texter: Dis is DASHKA U GAVE ME UR NUMBA OFF MYSPACE U LEFT IT ON MA COMMENT DO YOU REMBER OR U STILL NOT SURE?

Me: Wrong number.

Well, not 'rember'ing Dasha or our apparent MySpace love affair, I entered in Dashka's name in the MySpace search box, intrigued by who might show up.

What showed up was this:

Allow me to zoom in closer so that you might get a better glimpse of Daksha's literary interests.

I am so, so scared.

Food Find: Barbrix in Silverlake

After missing the driveway into Barbrix about 4 times and making the same number of U-turns on curvy Hyperion Avenue to try again, I finally found Silver Lake's newest wine and tapas bar last night.

While I can't speak much to the food--my friend and I tried only the Crispy Grilled Polenta--I can vouch for the teeny, tiny portion sizes after receiving our own dish and watching many others arrive at neighbors' tables around us. The tapas are indeed, by definition, small plates. Which for a girl with my appetite is problematic. But they're not terribly priced. And I suppose I could stand to learn some portion control anyway.

I ordered a glass of the Sauvignon Blanc and was pleased. After the second glass, I was tremendously pleased.

Tip #1: Don't sit at the bar during sun down--the large glass wall which faces it will have you feeling like you're lying in a tanning booth turned up dangerously high.

Tip #2: Arrive early--the restaurant fills up fast.

Tip #3: Avoid the $5 valet and easily find street parking nearby.

[Photo Credit: Zagat]

LA, a goat-laden wasteland.

Sometimes, when you think you've seen all that you could possibly see in the wildest city on Earth--the homeless and the trannies, the Hollywood stars and the celebrity car chases--you see a herd of goats in Downtown Los Angeles.

And you realize that, oh, there's more to see. Cause now there are barnyard animals at the corner of 3rd and Hill. And you're not really that surprised to see them there.


[And yes, the goats are no strangers to city life. They made an appearance last year as well. Via LA Times]

Sunday Funday c/o Playboy.

It's Sunday. And nothing says Sunday like bacon and eggs, the NY Times, and a girl in a shimmering bikini and thigh highs.

Have a good one Los Angeles.

xo * Jessie B. R.

The RSVP Line (Weekend Edition): Poketo Karaoke + Echo Park Fest + Renegade Crafts

T-G-I-[the mother f++king]-Weekend. Pardon the potty mouthed intro, but this week could not end soon enough. And the next few days are jam-packed with awesome free and fun activities. Because, apparently, the party Gods knew we needed a [mother f++king] break.

Tonight (Friday)! Get down with your local art community, care of Poketo at their Karaoke Dance Party. The party goes from 8 p - 1 a at Royal/T and offers something for everyone. For those who like to sing [badly], there is (duh) the karaoke. For those who prefer to shake a tail feather, there's (duh) dance. For those who get down with visuals, there's the Poketo pop-up to check out as well as the amazing collection housed by cafe-meets-gallery, Royal/T. Quick! RSVP here.

On Saturday and Sunday, the Echo Park Community Festival will be taking over what used to be the Lotus Festival (Lotus ran out of funds, so I've heard). The fest will take place in [where else] Echo Park. Though the website's art features dragons and ducks, I'm not promising either one. I just know there will be music and probably a lot of hipsters.

Also on both Saturday and Sunday is the Renegade Craft Fair, arriving in LA for the very first time. As we all know East Siders love to craft, I expected this to be held in Silverlake or somewhere equally artsy, but the fair makes its debut in Downtown LA at the California Market Center.

And if and when you do make it to Downtown, I highly recommend you stop by the sample sale going on over the weekend at Guy Baxter's studio (117 W. 9th Street, LA). I stopped by and spotted lots of great deals from $15 and up.

Happy weekend!! xoxo

art in LA: Public Art Party in Beverly Hills

If you're not yet familiar with ForYourArt, I suggest you get familiar. From the organization's Map of public art, to its involvement with amazing art events aroud town, FYA is making art happenings and art news accessible to the community.

This Saturday, FYA is hosting its first Public Art Party, celebrating the renowned Japanese artist Yayoi Kusama and I'm super excited. Find the details below and find me in Beverly Hills on Saturday! (I'll be the one shoving Crumbs cupcakes down my piehole while others are actually making note of the art.)

Public Art Party invites Angelenos to celebrate public art in Beverly Hills and the renowned Japanese artist Yayoi Kusama whose public sculpture, Hymn of Life: Tulips, is located on Santa Monica Boulevard and Rodeo Drive by participating in a one-day, self-guided cultural experience.

A special MAP ForYourArt: Public Art Party will be available at participating locations as well as online at www.publicartparty.com.

Public Art Party: Beverly Hills Locations

1. Yayoi Kusama's Hymn of Life: Tulips (Rodeo Drive and Santa Monica Boulevard)

The 10-foot-tall, brightly colored, floral sculpture is a beautiful example of Kusama's practice and the centerpiece of Public Art Party. Visitors can have their digital portrait taken in front of the sculpture as a keepsake that will be featured on publicartparty.com. Reading, knitting, hoola-hooping and yoga are encouraged in the park around the sculpture.

2. Videos by Yayoi Kusama at The Paley Center for Media (465 N. Beverly Drive)

The Paley Center for Media screens three short films by Kusama in the Bell Family Gallery: Flower Orgy (1968), Flower Obsession Gerbera (1999) and Flower Obsession Sunflower (2000) that highlight the trajectory and development of the artist’s use of the flower motif as an artistic model. As a special treat, the rooftop gardens will be open all day for picnicking.

3. Yayoi Kusama: Flowers That Bloom at Midnight at Gagosian Gallery (456 N. Camden Drive)

The Japanese artist's first solo show in Los Angeles since 1998 transforms the gallery space into a magnified and playful garden. Gagosian is open today for the festivities, and the exhibition is on view until July 17.

4. Picnic lunch from Porta Via (424 N. Canon Drive)

Pick up a box lunch at the neighborhood favorite to enjoy a picnic at Kusama’s Hymn of Life: Tulips or on the rooftop garden at the Paley Center for Media. Boxes include a panini, salad and a cookie. Call to order 310.274.6534.

5. Kusama-inspired cupcake from CRUMBS Bake Shop (9465 Little Santa Monica Boulevard)

CRUMBS Bake Shop is offering a special Kusama-inspired cupcake for Public Art Party.

Obsessions: toys, ponies, and parks

Remember those toys you had when you were young--the ones that had you dreaming of moving into fantasy lands, eating ice cream all day, and living on a cloud? Be it a dollhouse or a maze--the toy land seemed magical and far more fun than real life (later on, you would come to realize this was entirely true and regret not spending more time playing Candyland, but that is neither here nor there).

Well, I don't know if I'm just having Neverland-related fantasies from all the Michael Jackson hype, or if this is actually the coolest toy set known to child. But I'm just head-to-toe excited about this My Little Pony Ponyville Sweet Sundae Amusement Park Play Set. Not only is the name so long it could entertain you for hours, if not days, but check out some of these highlighted features...

• It’s just another day at the park for you and your pony pal—the amusement park, that is—with this fun-filled play set
• Park includes a pony figure, an ice cream parlor play set, a roller coaster play set, a Ferris wheel play set and play accessories
• The fun and surprises don’t end until you turn out the lights at this adventure-filled amusement park
• Manufacturer's Suggested Age: 4 Years and Up

Well, color me excited and older than 4 years old--I want to move in! I vote for a life size build-out of the whole shebang.

* The website for Hasbro--maker of both Candyland and My Little Pony seems not to be working. Which makes me wonder--have they gone belly up like every other business in the 50 United States?

Laugh Track: Upright Citizens Brigade

Sure, I started going to shows at the Upright Citizens Brigade (founded by Amy Poehler and other funny human beings) because I had to (classes at the theatre require two visits per term). But some of the best places I've ever visited would have gone unearthed had someone not forced me to go. Take the dentist, for example. Or jail.

The line to get in is a complete and utter hassle, yes. But the entertainment inside is good. And it's cheap. And there aren't many good, cheap entertainment options left in Los Angeles. Aside from dog-walking and gender guessing games on the corner of Santa Monica and Vine, going out in this city's expensive.

I can only speak to two of the theatre's shows so far--'Facebook' (featuring cutie Ron Huebel of The Office and Human Giant) and 'The Smokes' (featuring no one I know but dudes who were funny all the same). And both are worth the $5 to get in. They are especially worth the free admission for UCB students.

Tip No. 1 - Arrive early to wait in the block-long lines that form before popular shows.

Tip No. 2 - Arrive with entertainment for the wait--be it a deck of cards, a bottle of wine in a paper bag with a straw, or another human being.

Tip No. 3 - Sitting on the stage looks like it would be fun--being part of the spotlight and the action and all. But, in fact, you end up unable to see half the cast's faces. Which is not that fun after all.

Tip No. 4 - Apparently 'ASSSSCAT' is one of the better shows. I haven't seen it. But I would like to give it a 3rd party recommendation anyway.

ASSSSCAT - Medicinal Marijuana

www.comedycentral.com

Joke of the Day Stand-Up Comedy Free Online Games

Idiot Lotus Flower Who Runs with Children.

Beware--there are severely disabled Idiots out there and they have video cameras and access to children. Sometimes, they are racist. Sometimes, they're just plain stupid. They are throwing horrifically themed kids' parties and need to be stopped.

Exhibit A: Watch the video of this Idiot giving Native American Names to a gaggle of kids for a Native American themed party.


How to Give Native American Names to Kids -- powered by eHow.com

Stop the madness. Steal an Idiot's camera today.

* This is a warning from the Anti Idiot League of America. That's AILOA for short, yo.

Mind f**k: rad optical illusion.

Just because it's Monday and you obviously need a break, let me present to you the greatest mind f**k of the century, or at least of today--Monday, July 6th.

Take a look at the below (not for too long--I tried that and will now likely vomit) and notice the green and the blue spirals...

Now ooh and aah when I tell you that those spirals are actually the same flipping color. The orange spirals do not in fact go through the 'blue' spirals as they first appear to and the 'blue' is contrasted with a magenta, playing all sorts of wild tricks on our eyes.

Don't believe me? Well, I didn't believe in Santa Claus and then a reindeer landed in my backyard one day, so there you go.

[Via TED Blog via DISCOVER Magazine]

We Like to Party: En Tu Ciudad (or, a white girl learns to shake her boot-ay)

Last night, I went out with mi three amigos to the LA pit-stop of My Space Latino's En Tu Ciudad tour (which I painstakingly translated--for your sake, of course--to mean 'in your city'). In response to my RSVP, I had been emailed back with a secret password to enter the party. While password-protected parties usually make me want to hurl, I was excited as this password was so much fun to say--'Paloma.' (Try it--say it aloud--it's fun, I promise!) And apparently 'Palomas' would also be the featured drink special for the evening. Needing translation for this word as well, I asked my Latino coworker for assistance. He claimed 'Paloma' meant bird--something between a dove and a pigeon. Not satisfied with this definition, I googled it. 'Paloma,' it turns out, is also a tequila cocktail. I much preferred this translation.

At the party, after enjoying one or two (ok, perhaps three) Palomas, another of my Mexican cohorts explained that a Paloma is made with Tequila and Squirt. Well, after my initial shock...and then disgust...I settled on delight. Yes, I like Squirt cocktails--it's true!

My buddies in Wait. Think. Fast. performed an awesome set.

And I learned that there is such a thing as a cute accordion player.

I'm old and needed to get to bed before my coach turned into a pumpkin and/or I crashed my Jetta from too many Palomas. But the crowd continued to party on long after I did. Because, as it turns out, Latinos (not blondes) have much, much more fun.

The Pictures: (500) Days of Summer

I attended Gen Art's advance screening of '(500) Days of Summer' tonight. I went with high hopes for romance. (There is nothing more satisfying than a happy ending when you most expect it.) The film was definitely going to be an 'artsy' one--Zooey Deschanel seems to favor the kind (even her role in the uber-commercial 'Elf' was subversive)--but the trailer seemed to offer the promise of love--or at least love-making--and indie romance is better than none. But [without disclosing too much] '(500) Days of Summer' didn't deliver the happy ending I was hoping for.

The filmmakers depicted a stunningly truthful and beautiful portrayal of love's realistic pitfalls. But in the film's cinematic universe, the characters are far more attractive than the rest of us and are able to pick up the pieces of a broken heart at a rather un-realistically rapid pace. The leads, played by Deschanel and Joseph Gordon-Levitt, show much greater resilience and experience a good deal more luck than us mere non-actor mortals.

The movie is out on July 17th. See it for yourself. Perhaps the ending will satisfy you and your bizarre desire for realism in art. If nothing else, the soundtrack was pretty rad, featuring the likes of The Smiths, Feist, Hall & Oates, my absolute fave Regina Spektor, and other fine musicians.

Idol Worship: The religion of Celebrity

This week has seen the coming and going of more cultural icons than our celebrity-obsessed culture knows what to do with. And all the hubbub has made me wonder what in Hollywood's hot hell we're thinking and why we care so much about these individuals?

I like to be entertained as much as the next person (though my version of entertainment generally involves bad online TV accompanied by Chinese take out and a 12 pack of Diet Coke), but my relationship with the entertainer ends when the show/movie/song does. Jennifer Aniston and Angelina Jolie are not my best friends (though they may play them on TV), Brad Pitt is not my boyfriend, and Kanye West is not my spiritual adviser (despite his attempts at prophecy).

While Michael Jackson’s untimely passing is undoubtedly a tragedy, we’d not heard new music from him since 2001. He was last in the news for controversial molestation charges and massive debt. And while mourning him, I understand--a fellow human being has passed too soon--one that we felt like we knew through his music, one who'd earned our compassion for his troubled childhood and saddened spirit--it's the parades and idolization and worldwide pandemonium following his death that I'm not sure I comprehend. He was a human. And humans die. Especially ones that undergo frequent elective surgery and ingest oodles of scrips over a lifetime. And I think our reaction as a society begs the question--what are our priorities? Why do we choose to revere some people as gods and dismiss others as insignificant? How are we still, in 2009, practicing idol worship?

Dear Farrah...

Thanks for being an inspiring beauty. At 62, you were hotter than I am at 22 (that's right, 22, ya hear me!).

[Source: LA Times - Pop culture icon Farrah Fawcet dies...]

The RSVP Line: Brand X Celebrates L.A. in Short at LAFF

Brand X, the new weekly pub from the LA Times, is celebrating the 9 winners of its L.A. in Short Video Competition this Friday night at the Los Angeles Film Festival. And you're invited.

If my being there is not enough, here are 5 additional reasons you should join me...

1. Music selections will be courtesy of one of the competition's judges, Nic Harcourt, LA Magazine's Editor at Large.

2. Drinks are on me from the open bar.

3. Film gets you hot.

4. You'll have the chance to view the winning entries and cast your vote for the contest's Grand Prize Winner--an honor and an obligation you'd be a real a**hole to miss.

5. Westwood's not that far away. I promise.

L.A. in Short Celebration
Los Angeles Film Festival - ZonePerfect live.create.lounge
1028 Westwood Blvd. (between Kinross and Weyburn)
Westwood, CA 90024

(Get directions here)

Send your RSVP to rsvp@latimes.com

LaughTrack: the cast of The Hangover gives good sketch.

I don't know what The Hangover is about. Before the billboards appeared last month, I had never seen the bearded man who plays comedic sidekick to the handsome Bradley Cooper in the film. But as it turns out, Zach Galifianakis is the most engaging comedian I've seen in ages.

He is the comedian I would be if I were funny. And performing for a living. And incredibly and superbly amazing. He is the man I'd marry if he weren't a little overweight. And a stoner.

Between Two Ferns with Zach Galifianakis from Between Two Ferns

When sweet things happen to endangered media folk.

Working at the LA Times is like reading a really engaging thriller novel. You never know who's going down next. And you never really can tell who's yielding the weapon. But sometimes, something happens--you have a really great day, or you feel like you're making a significant contribution, or somebody does something extra nice--and you're like--oh, cool, that's why you like working here. Well, in this case, the somebody is Sprinkles Cupcakes and the extra nice thing is this invite, received today, inviting LAT employees down next Thursday to try some grub from its brand new Sprinklesmobile.

While LA needs another eatery on wheels like Florida needs another retired senior, I'm still stoked that LA's finest [bakers, that is] know we're here, we need a morale boost, and we're hungry goddamnit.

Follow the Sprinklesmobile on Twitter to find out when a sugar high is coming to a corner near you.

The first thing that I DON'T hate about Ed Hardy.

I hate Ed Hardy. In the entire city of Los Angeles, there is little that offends me more than the sight of an illustrated lion bedazzled with more rhinestones than God meant to be created [ever], let alone affixed to one shirt.

But I have to admit...and it pains me...that I don't completely hate the new Ed Hardy ad campaign. Perhaps it's just because I know it's shot by the masterful David LaChapelle, but it seems [almost] not that awful. Not that I'll be sporting the staple rhinestone-emblazoned trucker hat any time soon.

[Source: WWD Memo Pad]

Shop: a Sample Sale we're excited for.

And when I say we, I mean me. Obvs.

One of Downtown's fashion hubs, the California Market Center, hosts a sample sale next Friday, June 26th. The showrooms, normally reserved for industry pros, opens its doors to you, the eager and adoring public. So go forth, shop, and pick something up for me por favor (I'm a size 6, but I'll squeeze into whatever you manage to scrounge up, thank you very much).

Design Dish: Jimmy Choo for the Poor

If Jimmy Choo was good enough for Sex & the City's Carrie, it's apparently good enough for all of us. Jimmy Choo--heel provider for the rich, famous and better dressed--is the latest designer to announce collaboration with H&M, everyone's favorite low-budge fashion stop.

The collaboration promises a more moderately priced collection of bags, shoes and clothes for those of us who can't afford the real thing. Here's to hoping that Jimmy Choo delivers with style and quality. Because I'm onto the high end designers who sign on to these deals only to put their junior-est staff to work on what ends up as mediocre [at best] product. Remember Alexander McQueen for Target? No? Neither do I.

[Source: LA Times]

Food Find: stuffing my face at Bottega Louie

Sometimes, stuffing yourself into a state of dizzying, stomach-throbbing proportions is a bad thing. And occasionally, it's just delicious.

Last night Bil, Jessica and I headed downtown to Bottega Louie, the new market/bar/restaurant that has the corner of 7th and Grand abuzz. Beautiful marble, attractive waitstaff and just a touch of gilt make the cavernous space feel a little bit museum, a little bit Dean & Deluca.

We started our evening at the bar. I started my buzz with a Lemon Drop.

When we finally reached our table in the main dining room, the waitress emphasized [over and over again] that the Bottega Louie menu was best experienced family style. So, at her suggestion, we ordered a little bit of this and a little bit of that. Namely, we ordered the Modena Salad, Rigatoni Pomodoro, Fettucine Belmondo, Heirloom Carrots, Brussel Sprouts with Almonds, and--oh yeah--the Margherita Pizza. My carnivorous dining mates attempted an order of the sea bass as well, but there was a little problem with bones in the "boneless" fish. Oops.

I forgot to take a picture of the food as it came. But you can see here how it went. And how...

And then there was the small remaining matter of dessert. We skipped the 25 minute wait for the house special, the Chocolate Souflee, and opted instead for the Peanut Butter Terrine. I'm not sure what Terrine means. But it tasted like a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup which is cool by me.

So, yeah, there were some problems with the fish. And a couple of communication glitches with our well-meaning waitress. And the larger problem of me eating ad nauseum. But I'd do it again. I totally, totally would.

Do Good: Global Giving

At a recent event I worked at the Ferragamo store, I learned about Global Giving, an online donation portal for community based projects that need support. Users can search the site for the issues and countries they'd like to support and voila!--with the click of a button and the donation amount that's right for them--they can make a difference.

Upon exit from the event, Global Giving gave out gift cards so that guests could experience the incredible act of giving first hand. I just donated my funds to an organization that builds homes for people with AIDS in Africa.

I encourage you to check out the site, make a donation yourself, or give a gift card as a gift on your friends' or family's next special occasion. Father's Day is coming up this Sunday. Perhaps Dad would rather support human rights issues in Cambodia or education programs in Kenya than wear those sucky cuff links you were thinking about buying him.

www.globalgiving.com

Victory and Pride. Apparently in LA.

Today was an LA kind of day. Almost every resident within the county was celebrating something--whether it be gay pride, the Lakers' big win, or the sun finally showing its face through the recent curtain of June gloom. But somehow, I missed it all--the parading drag queens, the rioting fans in gold and purple--I managed to outrun the excitement. Somehow I made it through my day with nary a homosexual or sports fan in sight. And I feel like I missed out. Like somehow a city that's so big, a resident could escape all the action, isn't a city at all.

But yet I'm a resident here. I'm nearing my fourth year, in my second car, and about to sign a lease on a third apartment. There's no longer any denying that I'm an Angeleno. Forever or just for another year, for good or bad--I'm here and I may as well embrace it. So, huge congrats to Kobe Bryant and the Lakers. March on, ye drag queens, fabulous gays, and straight girls of West Hollywood. Next time, just remind me to join the party.

[Photo Credits: LA Times]

The last Virgin standing. And she's on sale.

Walking through Hollywood & Highland last night I popped into the Virgin Megastore and discovered half the store completely dissembled. And the other half 70% off. The clearance sale which has been going on for weeks and weeks already has finally become a real sale and worth heading to (the earlier 10-30% didn't impress me much). I don't know how long it will be going on for before they run out of goods, so get there this weekend for vinyl, DVDs and CDs priced even cheaper than their iTunes alternatives.

I picked up: Antony and the Johnsons' The Crying Light and Yelle's Pop-Up.

Happy shopping!

[Image Credit: LA Times Pop & Hiss]

The RSVP Line: Do good. Get fit. Free.

Dear [female] reader friends,

You all say you want to do good, give back, etcetera, etcetera. But what have you really given lately [beside that chewing gum wrapper you accidentally dropped into that homeless man's cup instead of a quarter]? That's right. Nothing. So, here's a fun way to find out about an amazing non-profit organization, Step Up Women's Network, that supports mentorship programs for young girls.

Get your butts in gear for this Sunday's FREE day of fitness and awesomeness at The Sports Club/LA. Your registration entitles you to a free class, snacks and fitness tips from our guest speaker. As well as networking opps with all sorts of rad ladies. So, basically, Step Up is giving YOU all this free stuff. And all you have to do is go to the event and check 'em out.

Sunday, June 14th
2 - 5:30 p

For more info on the event and the list of classes to choose from, click here.

To RSVP: just send an email with your name, email address, and the class you'd like to attend to michelle@suwn.org. And let her know I sent you. Painless. And an impressive story to tell to all your do-gooding friends next time they start going on about their work with the displaced locals in that country somewhere.

Angelina Jolie, the unwilling cover model.

I know that I am late to this news, but apparently the subject of Harper's Bazaar's July newstand cover story is Angelina Jolie. But she's not necessarily a willing cover model. The shot is actually borrowed from a Getty Images red carpet shot. And the feature inside is an essay about, rather than an interview with, the subject.

The stunt feels rather desperate and awkward on Bazaar's part. Especially when I so willingly would have volunteered for the spot of cover model atop their glossy periodical.

[Source: WWD Memo Pad: Much Ado]

Pauline Parry: Hostess with the Mostess

There are few things in life that I enjoy more than eating. Well, sure, there are a couple of things I'd prefer to chowing down--I mean, I'm not a hedonistic pig, for goodness sake. But, for the sake of this piece, let's begin with the fact that I do love to eat. And I love, love, love a good party. Which is why yesterday's event [at the gorgeous new event space, High Profile Productions], celebrating the very first book penned by Pauline Parry (the hostess with the mostess and owner of Good Gracious! Events), was such a treat.

The book, 'FOOD FUN LOVE: PARTY STYLES,' contains tips on entertaining and recipes for those daring enough to do the cooking on their own. I, myself, am not such a master in the kitchen, but for those of you with a bit more culinary coordination, I implore you to buy the book, throw a party, and invite me over. If your version of Pauline's mac and cheese hors d'ouevres is anything close to yesterday's sampling, I will gladly attend and will likely stay til you kick me out.

Thanks to Sarah of Pink Cloud Events for inviting me to tag along!

Food Find: Loteria Grill

Downtown just wasn't good enough for my coworker Uriel and I today. In an effort to expand our culinary horizons beyond Cesar Chavez Avenue, we ventured into Hollywood for lunch at Loteria Grill, the second outpost of a restaurant best known for its Farmers Market origins, and named after Loteria, the Mexican game of chance. I had had the pleasure of meeting Chef and Owner of Loteria Grill, Jimmy Shaw, during his memorable appearances at our Travel Show in February. But I hadn't yet tasted the real Mexican magic from his kitchen.

My dining mate and I started out with 'Queso Panela a la Plancha con Nopalitos.' I cannot translate this for you exactly. But imagine a square of awesome cheese. Topped with cactus. Topped with salsa and guacomole. Perhaps this is not as spectacular sounding as it tastes. But trust me. It's pretty freaking spectacular.

Next, Chef sent out the 'Chicharron de Queso,' which can pretty much be summed up with the below picture of a towering cone of crispy, fried cheese. Salty and amazing.

While we didn't get around to drinks--though our waitress did ask us if we were having a 'wet lunch'--the bar can only be described as fully stocked.

And I plan on returning soon for some more awesome Fried Cheese on a Plate accompanied by a Tequila-Something-or-Other. It all sounds delightful in Spanish, I promise.

Life in clubLAnd: What’s wrong with Hollywood.

There are numerous things wrong with Hollywood. I mean, the list is endless. Some areas are still dirty. Others are too clean and touristy. The traffic is bad. Grown men dressed as costumed cartoon characters will assault you on the street. And for God’s sake, the Scientologists have got to be stopped.

But this party flyer basically takes all the hobos and the addicts and the paparazzi and makes them seem like characters out of Pleasantville. Cause this—this, people—is what’s really wrong with Hollywood.


No. 1 – Who the f++k is Gemini and why should I care? In case you wondered the same thing, it turns out that Gemini Pop Diva is a ‘young aspiring singer of ethnic background.’ Well, those are her words. My words would more likely come in the form of advice to put on some decent clothes and wipe that awful tranny makeup off her face.

No. 2 – The press release accompanying this flyer tells us that “Jason Wahler is a former Mtv The Hills & Laguna Beach Star as well as ex-boyfriend to Lauren Conrad….People normally confuse him with Actor Colin Farrell since they both look alike and share the same Irish heritage.” I’d like to remind Jason’s publicist that a) people who appear in reality television shows are not ‘stars.’ They are people. Who openly humiliate themselves on national TV. b) Being someone’s ex boyfriend is not a feat. It is just over. And c) Some people think I look like Jamie Lee Curtis. So what?

No. 3 – Being David Hasselhoff’s ex-wife and the mother of his children does not make one interesting. Being convicted of a hit and run makes you even more un-interesting. In fact, it makes you a terrible human being, not a candidate for club-night host.

And that, friends, is what's happening in clubLAnd this week. And what is so terribly wrong with Hollywood.